choices

“This sorrow is crushing my life out.” Matthew 26:38 (The Message)

“There is a part of you that is eager, ready for anything in God. But there’s another part that’s as lazy as an old dog sleeping by the fire.” Matthew 26:41 (The Message)

There are times in life when our sorrow does suck the life out of us. Deeply demanding choices are before us. We don’t want to face them; in truth, we often feel that we don’t have what is needed to face them.   However, reality teaches that escape is not an option—whether we are intentional about choosing or we force life to make choices for us by default (by doing nothing), life choices are made and life directions are taken. The question is, how will we face our choices and make the decisions that must be made?

Jesus had an excruciating decision before him. He was fully human; his life on earth was very demanding but also very rich in purpose and relationships. For three years he had enjoyed the companionship of people whom he loved dearly and invested in deeply. Now the time had come for him to leave them, first temporarily and then for a much longer time than they could ever imagine. Now he must choose whether to please himself and those he loved or God, the Father. His choice was devastatingly hard because the ramifications were very real—not just for himself and those close to him, but for many others throughout time, as well. His sorrow was so great that it drove him to his knees before God, pleading for other options and the ability to face what lay before him. Jesus, the man, needed help and the Holy Spirit was there, enabling him to move from the desire to please himself to an openness and acceptance of the truth and reality that the Father’s way was the best way (the only way) and that surrendering himself was the only true choice that he could make.

Jesus had to be moved from loving and obeying his own desires to loving and obeying the Father’s plan—for the sake of loving all creation throughout time. It was a choice of obedience, yes—he had to surrender to God, the Father’s way. But the motivation was not obedience—that was the action. The motivation was LOVE—love for the Father (with all his heart, soul, mind and strength) and love for all of mankind (loving his neighbor as himself; therefore, surrendering his life so all could live). The Trinity’s “bottom line” is always LOVE.

My own choices in life have not born the same ramifications as Jesus’, but many have been devastatingly sorrowful for me just the same. Avoiding the hard work and letting life make the choices for me can be very tempting, but it ultimately deepens my sorrow and takes me down paths where I don’t want to go. In my sorrow, I have also been driven to my knees before God, pleading for other options and for the courage and strength to face what lay before me. Each time, the Holy Spirit has gently but firmly brought me to the Father’s “bottom line”. Love is the motivation of heart that I must be open to and accepting of, that I must be willing to surrender to, if I am to make the only true choices that I can make. Life choices can be hard, but help is always available to those who ask for it.  I don’t want to face living with choices that are made apart from LOVE.